All jokes aside, I’ve been in a fog since day one, mainly because I live on little to no sleep. You see, my 3 month old LOVES to fight sleep. She is a champion and would get a gold medal if the Olympics ever turned it into a sport. Her record for fighting her bedtime still holds at 4 hours straight. We, at one point, thought she had colic but the doctor eased our mind and told us she is stubborn and thinks she will miss something important if she sleeps. Obviously, this was a relief, but at the same time my husband and I still weren’t getting any sleep at night. We tried rocking chairs (we ended up getting one for every room), swings (we have 2 of those as well), warm baths, noise machines, walking around the house with her strapped into a baby carrier, mobiles, the stroller, bouncy chairs, car rides, and everything in between. I cried more during the first 2 months of her life than I did my entire pregnancy. All I wanted was some delicious and peaceful sleep.

My prayers were answered about yhree weeks ago. After a tearful conversation with my mother, I got a text from her to call my cousin E. My cousin E told me everything will be just fine and proceeded to tell me about double swaddling. She too recently had a baby and the double swaddle technique had given her household some quiet at night. I admit, I was sassy and told her I knew how to swaddle and that crud did not work. She told me to check my email. What I found was like hitting the lottery. What I had failed to realize was that my swaddle was missing an extremely crucial step. I will now share this secret with you. Hopefully you can begin to get a little rest.

Materials: 2 large blankets (swaddling blanket works best) or 1 large blanket and a sleep sack or footy pajamas with a zipper
Step 1: Lay out a blanket in the form of a diamond and fold down a corner. (I use Aden & Anais blankets because that is what was recommended to me. They are large and perfect for swaddling.)

Step 2: Lay baby on the top center of the blanket with the shoulders just below the folded corner of the blanket.

Step 2

Step 3: Take one side of the blanket and tuck it over the baby’s arm and under her body. Repeat the same technique on the other arm.

Step 3

Step 4: Take the folded part of the blanket and bring it up in between your baby’s legs and up to her chest.

Step 4

Let’s take a quick moment to brush up on our baby education. There was an article published in 2008 by the New York Times titled “The Right Way to Swaddle.” This article brought awareness to parents about the effects of swaddling on the developing hips of a baby. This is why the fabric should go between the legs and not around.

Step 5: If you swaddle like I do, you may have one side longer than the other. Take the short side or a corner and tuck it underneath your baby. Take the long side or the other corner and do the same.

Step 5

Step 6: Next, you can either use another blanket to swaddle the baby in the regular way or you can use a sleep sack or footy pajamas with a zipper.

Step 6

My daughter A is hot-natured, so when I double swaddle I always strip her down to a fresh and clean diaper so she doesn’t sweat too much and I put her in a light footy pajama or wrap the sleep sack band around her to keep her snug (as shown in the pictures). Customize the swaddle to best fit the comfort of your baby. Has double swaddling worked for you? What other techniques do you recommend? HAPPY SWADDLING!

P.S. No arms or legs were harmed during the mummification of my darling little girl. Even though it looks like she is crying, she is actually laughing and enjoying herself.

Snug as a bug!

What I like most about this photo is the creative red carpet and arch! Have you done anything creative like this for homecoming?

JOINT BASE PEARL HARBOR-HICKAM, Hawaii (March 4, 2013) Senior Chief Sonar Technician Jim Sowa kisses his wife for the first kiss following the return of the Los Angeles-class attack submarine USS Olympia (SSN 717) to Joint Base Pearl Harbor-Hickam after completing a seven-month deployment to the western Pacific region. (U.S. Navy photo by Mass Communication Specialist 2nd Class Steven Khor/Released)

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Release Date: 3/5/2013 7:03:00 AM

By Mass Communication Specialist 2nd Class Steven Khor, Commander, Submarine Force, U.S. Pacific Fleet Public Affairs

PEARL HARBOR, Hawaii (NNS) — Friends and families of the crew from USS Olympia (SSN 717) gathered at the submarine piers to welcome back the Los Angeles-class submarine as she returned to Joint Base Pearl Harbor-Hickam after completing a seven-month deployment to the Western Pacific region, March 4.

“Olympia accomplished national tasking, theatre tasking, and security cooperation events throughout the 7th Fleet area, and enhanced continued relations with our allies overseas,” said Cmdr. Michael J. Boone, Olympia’s commanding officer.

Boone said the submarine crew worked around the clock applying months of preparations and workups into mission accomplishment. The range of the missions offered a broad aspect for training and development, creating experienced Sailors across all mission areas.

“The hard work and determination from the crew of Olympia these past seven months developed a camaraderie that is second to none. We are returning to Pearl Harbor as a more experienced and capable unit,” said Boone.

During the deployment, two officers and 21 enlisted Sailors earned their designation as qualified in submarines and now wear their dolphin warfare insignia.

Boone added the crew was able to get time off to experience the diverse cultures in Yokosuka, Japan; Subic Bay, Philippines; Guam, and Singapore. While in a few of these foreign ports, foreign dignitaries and ambassadors toured the submarine.

When the deployment was finally complete, the crew came home to a waiting crowd of smiling family and friends at the pier.

“I am estatic, it’s been such a long time! The best thing is just to hold my husband and have him home.” said Beecee Hall, an Olympia spouse.

USS Olympia is the second ship named after Olympia, Wash. Commissioned Nov. 17, 1984, Olympia is the 29th ship of the Los Angeles-class nuclear attack submarines. The submarine is 362-feet long, displaces 6,900 tons and can be armed with sophisticated Mark-48 torpedoes and Tomahawk cruise missiles.

For more news from Commander, Submarine Force, U.S. Pacific Fleet, visit www.navy.mil/local/subpac/.

Additional photo here.

Now that we are on a shore tour, I’m medically done being pregnant, and I’m not working full-time for the first time in 10 years, there is no excuse for me to not do better for myself. If I don’t do it now, I don’t know how I will face another deployment when we go back on sea duty in 3 years. I’m not getting any younger, and it’s only going to get harder. Plus, I have three little boys to chase after; they are fast, and I have a hard time keeping up. To me, this is not acceptable. It is time.

We are currently stationed in Pensacola, which admittedly has a brand new, state-0f-the-art gym. However, in the classic Navy way, they did not build in any kind of child care mechanism and I always have two toddlers with me. Evenings aren’t an option because of my school-aged son and his activities (soccer practice, soccer games, Cub Scouts, etc). So I started walking. I recently made up my mind that I can do even better. I’ve started tracking my food and caloric intake with the Lose It! app, and I started the Couch to 5K training program. NAS Pensacola built a great park on the Sea Wall along Pensacola Bay, so  I take the kids there to run (they ride in the stroller while I do the main part of my workout, then they get out and run alongside during my cool down). I’m greatly reducing the amount of highly-processed food my family eats. I’m using “real” foods as much as possible. My progress so far has been slow. I’ve lost 1.4 lbs. But I have to remind myself that I’m doing this to be healthier and it’s not only about the number on the scale. I feel better, I’m gaining flexibility, I’m less sore after each workout, and I’m slowly gaining speed. As added bonuses, I even have a slight tan starting and my naturally blond hair is getting a nice sun-kissed appearance.

My husband is currently training for a 10K race and my 8yo son is training for a 5K. They’re at the two mile run part of their training, which lines up nicely with my workout and the Sea Wall (which is a perfect mile one way). We went together as a family on Monday thanks to the federal holiday, and I loved it. It’s great to be giving our kids the idea that fitness is fun and that we can all do it together. We are all going again this afternoon. I’m hoping to really get in the routine of my workouts before the weather gets miserably hot and humid (which is realistically only a few weeks away – this is Florida, after all).

In short, this is what I’m doing:

1) Tracking food and calories in Lose It! app.

2) Reducing processed foods and using real foods as often as possible.

3)I’m actually using 3 apps to track my workouts: a) Runkeeper, which tracks my mileage and calories burned; b) Charity Miles, which donates money for each mile walked/run/biked to the charity of your choice (I chose Wounded Warrior Project – it’s a nice incentive to keep up the hard work!) and finally, c) Couch to 5K Training Program (C25K), which is helping me to gradually start running and prepare to run my own 5K sometime in the future!

4) Getting my entire family involved in being healthier!

I’ll share some of the smaller things I am doing (to help curb cravings, etc.)  and share some healthy recipes in later posts.

My initial goal is to lose 30 pounds. Once I’ve done that, I can work on more – but I don’t want to get too far ahead of myself.

Is anyone else up to the task? Will you accept our fitness challenge? Tell us what you are doing to lead a healthier lifestyle!

That dreaded bathroom scale!

Who among us couldn’t stand to lose a few pounds or to be in better shape? Do you dread going to the doctor because you’re going to receive the obligatory “You need to lose weight?” lecture? Is your weight contributing to other health issues?

In a world where the media has shaped how both men and women look at their bodies, I think the majority of women have a poor self-image, regardless of weight, shape, or size. Let’s face it, we weren’t all born to be Victoria’s Secret models, but that doesn’t mean we all aren’t beautiful in our own ways. After all, we are all military spouses – which already makes us ten times stronger than our civilian counterparts! Not everyone can (or does) cope well with our military lifestyle.

Both blogger Vanessa and I have recently had babies, and are working toward losing that baby weight (and then some!). We are starting a new blog series here at MyMilitaryLife to hold each other accountable. Losing weight and getting in shape is so much easier with the support of your friends and community. We hope to share our strategies and our healthy recipes with you, as well as our progress. We invite you to join us, whether your goal is weight loss, leading a healthier lifestyle, or looking for someone to commiserate with while you try to stick to that New Year’s Resolution.

What do you do to try to maintain a healthy weight? Do you try fad diets or simply watching your calories? Are you using any “apps” to help you? How did you determine your goals? Tell us in the comments!

 Click here to download image

“My heart is, and always will be, yours.” – Sense and Sensibility 

Before there was Downton Abbey there was Sense and Sensibility. This film is one of my all time favorites. It is filled with many great quotes, one of which I have used above for this Valentine’s Day eCard.

The long nights of a deployment can seem even longer on holidays. If your Valentine is far from home this night, know that you are not alone. Everyday that you are separated is one day closer to being reunited.

Were you able to Skype with your Valentine? …or send a care package?

Please leave me a comment with how you celebrated or how you will celebrate upon your love’s return.

I  made a batch of laundry soap in December of 2011. I made a half batch of soap because I couldn’t find all the ingredients in the quantities specified in the recipe. That half batch washed 5 regular loads and 3 heavy-duty and soiled loads a week each week during a month and several pints of it were shared with my friends for them to try. The half batch lasted me until August of 2012. In September of 2012, I changed recipes to a milder formula that is specifically made to use on baby clothes, cloth diapers, and those with sensitive skin. I also invested in a 5 gallon bucket to hold a full batch of detergent, which should last me around 9 months to a year. Since many of my friends have asked me for either a sample of my detergent or the recipe itself, I decided to share the recipe with everyone. The one I am using is the Baby/Sensitive detergent since I can use it for everyone in my house.

Ingredients:

5 gallon paint bucket and lid (find at your local hardware store)

1 plastic/metal tablespoon measuring spoon

1 face mask or bandana (to tie around your nose and mouth so you don’t inhale the chemicals)

1 medium plastic Tupperware container (optional)

3 boxes of Arm & Hammer Washing Soda (55 oz each)

2 boxes of 20 Mule Team Borax (76 oz each)

1 large tub/box of OxiClean (96 oz)    (I found the box I used at the local hardware store. It was a  7 lb box and I used ALL of it)

3 bars of shredded Fels-Naptha or plain Castile soap (use a food processor or cheese grater and grate the bars to resemble shredded cheese)

Directions:

Make sure the bucket is clean and dry. Put your mask or bandanna on.  Pour 1 box of A&H and borax into the bucket. Pour 1/3 of the OxiClean and Fels-Naptha/Castile soap into the bucket and mix everything with a plastic spoon. Then pour the remaining boxes of A&H, Borax, OxiClean and the remaining Fels-Naptha in the bucket and mix until somewhat well blended. Scoop some of your mixture into the Tupperware container for easy access to your detergent without hauling around a 5 gallon bucket. Use the tablespoon to measure out the amount you need for your laundry. Add 1 heaping tablespoon to the washing machine as you fill it with water for a small load (it’s always best to add powder before you add your clothes, so that it begins to dissolve first). Add 2 scoops for a medium or regular load. For extra dirty loads, use 3 scoops.

**To make the detergent for sensitive skin or in place of baby laundry detergent do not add the Fels-Naptha/Castile soap to the mixture**

About a week before homecoming, my husband casually mentioned he had duty the day the ship was supposed to pull in. I thought he was joking until he got super quiet and said he was serious. I didn’t know whether to cry or proceed in pure anger. I got angry. I knew it wasn’t my husband’s fault, but he got the grunt of what I would have given the so-and-so in charge of making the duty schedule. Not only did they forget he was a new daddy, but they ruined my plans for the perfect homecoming on the pier looking all sorts of cute with my girls. Being the good husband that he is, my husband decided to ask around and see if anyone was willing to trade duty sections with him so he could meet his daughter the day they pulled in. A few days later, he told me a newbie on the ship traded with him since he wouldn’t have any family on the pier. In my mind, the newbie made my Christmas! I even went on Facebook thanking the faceless sailor hoping he was a Facebook friend with my husband. With plans back on track, and two days before homecoming, it was time to go shopping for a new outfit. For all of you ladies who’ve ever gained a little extra while pregnant, you know how I was feeling at that moment. Not only was that the first time I’d gone shopping after having a baby, but the added pressure of looking extra hot for a man who hasn’t seen me since BEFORE my stomach expanded was almost unbearable. Lucky for me, I took my friend K with me. She gave me the confidence to try on things I normally wouldn’t wear and I was able to find an outfit. Little did I know I wouldn’t get a chance to get all dolled up or even dress in that outfit.

Once I got home, I had about an hour to spare before I had to go and pick up my oldest daughter N. For me, it was prime quiet/nap time with the baby. So I changed into my comfy clothes and laid down for a nap. I woke up with enough time to go and pick up N from school. Keep in mind, I am still in my comfy clothes with no intention of changing until 30-45 minutes before heading out the door to her holiday program about 3 hours later. In the meantime, we ate pizza, nibbled on buckeyes and fudge, watched Netflix.  I fed the baby her supper, and talked to my mom on the phone. I was describing my day and what that week looked like to my mom when, all of a sudden, the doorbell rang. My oldest and I immediately looked at the baby wondering if she was going to get upset. You see, I had a sign taped over the doorbell that specifically told people to knock because the doorbell wakes/startles the baby. Apparently, this person cannot read, so N got up to peek out the window and see who it was. I thought it was UPS dropping off another package. When I asked N who was at the front door, she shouted back, “It’s B.” I thought she was joking. My mom even asked me what she said, and I told her N told me B was at the front door. All of a sudden, I hear my daughter slam open the front door while screaming his name at the top of her lungs through excitement and tears. The sound of her joyful screams and the door slamming open caused a wave of panic and excitement to rush through my body. With baby on my right shoulder and phone on my left ear, I jokingly told my mom I was going to “investigate” this little prank N was playing on me.  As soon as I turned the corner from my living room to face the wide open front door, all I saw was my husband in his dress blues smiling and holding a bouquet of fresh flowers. At that moment I screamed in my mom’s ear, “Oh my God! It’s him! He’s home! It’s B!”

He’s home!

My mom later told me she was a little confused about what’s going on, but she was quickly able to put two and two together. I won’t lie to you, I wanted to drop everything I was carrying and throw my arms around my husband. I know, I know, that would have been terrible and it would have been caught on camera. I actually stood there for about 30 seconds trying to tell my mom I would call her back later. In the meantime, there was this cute  little photographer just snapping away, capturing everything, including my “ugly cry face” and me in my comfy clothes. My husband and the photographer I hired planned a surprise homecoming for me since my husband had pull-in duty on homecoming day. Those two got me good!

Vanessa’s Surprise Homecoming

After getting a nice long hug in, I handed the baby to daddy and cried some more. It took a few before the shock wore off and reality kicked in. It was everything I’d been waiting to see, except it was happening on my front doorstep instead of on the pier. My family was finally together and my Christmas wish had been fulfilled.

Daddy and baby for the first time

Can I see a show of hands for everyone with little kids? I was thinking about you all this week as I was asked to babysit an actual baby.

Who knows the song by the Byrds, to which the lyrics are “To everything turn, turn, turn/ There is a season turn, turn, turn.” That is also from the Bible – but adding the “turn, turn” makes it catchy. There is also a time that is not mentioned and that is to not remember what to do with a baby, turn, turn, turn.

I remember being a good mom; what I mean is, I was a fantastic mother! I loved having babies, so cuddly and sweet. Those babies are now 17, 15, 11, and 9, slightly less cuddly, and sweet only on occasion. I don’t spend a lot of time with babies, I don’t go to playgroups anymore, we don’t grab Starbucks. I do have one very good friend who has little ones. They come over for dinner, we all get a sweet little kid fix and off they go. Sort of like grandparents – but not as old.

This week my friend asked me to watch her baby. I would do anything for this girl, so I said “ Sure, no problem!” I mean, the baby is a one year old, not a tiny baby; it would be fun, right?

They showed up promptly at 7:30, before I  had coffee, and she gave me instructions that seemed vaguely familiar: bottle, nap, pacifier – and in a flash, my friend was gone. It was just the baby, me, and the laundry I thought I would fold while we hung out.

That is when I remembered this baby deal is time-consuming; I had to be with her the whole time. Looking back, I could have taken her from room to room but for some reason (I blame the lack of coffee), we stayed in the living room. We talked about the Christmas tree, the dog, the throw pillows, all while stopping her from pulling the tree and the dog. I taught her “more” in sign language (did I mention she is a genius?). It was a great time  - until it wasn’t. She cried, I bounced; she cried, I tried the bottle. Then I remembered the DIAPER, check the diaper! It was poo, you knew it had to be. I handled that like a newbie, way too many wipes, and I am sure I took twice as long as her mom would have. We moved on to playing music; I danced and sang like a goofball so she would laugh. She did finally take her bottle – right as her mom came back.

After she left I was exhausted, still had laundry to fold, and thought about all of you out there. Those with babies plus little kids being on duty 24 hours, many of you with spouses deployed. My heart goes out to you. I sort of remember those days, though it is a little bit of a blur. I want you all to know that, as hard as it can get with little people on you all day with no break, they grow.  In no time you will be the mom who no longer meets friends at playgroups, but at coffee shops, and when asked to babysit may forget to check the diaper of a crying baby.

Raising kids of all ages has its challenges, but enjoying where they are in this moment is key. Go to the store and see a teenager roll their eyes and say something under their breath then hug your little ones. Kiss them and be thankful for little arms around your neck. It goes by so fast.

I will talk about the joys of teenagers in a later post. My 15 year old just read this and “insists” on it. I think I saw her roll her eyes while she said that…

*No children were harmed in the research for this blog post.

The new 2013 BAH rates are now available.

To check your BAH 2013 rate, visit this link for the calculator:

https://www.defensetravel.dod.mil/site/bahCalc.cfm

The rates go into effect 1 Jan 2013.

Remember, the rates are for new military families moving into an area. If your specific rate goes down, you’ll continue to receive the same amount.

Related link:

Basic Allowance for Housing (BAH) Frequently Asked Questions (FAQs)

Related story:

DOD Announces 2013 Housing, Subsistence Allowance Rates

By Claudette Roulo
American Forces Press Service

WASHINGTON, Dec. 17, 2012 – On Jan. 1, 2013, service members can expect to see an average increase of about $60 in their 2013 basic allowance for housing, Cheryl Anne Woehr, the BAH program manager, said Dec. 13.

Overall, rates went up an average of 3.8 percent, Woehr said. Rate increases were spread throughout the country.

“There wasn’t any particular one region that was a big winner or a big loser this year,” she said.

Service members in New York City will receive the largest increase this year — 14.7 percent on average — followed closely by Altus Air Force Base, Okla., which will see a 14.1 percent average increase.

Rates for BAH are set through annual reviews of market rents, utility costs and renter’s insurance rates, Woehr said.

“We measure those in each location for various types of housing,” she said.

The BAH program office surveys property managers to determine current rental rates in each duty location. Housing types considered include apartments, town homes and duplexes, as well as single-family rental units of various bedroom sizes. Utility information is derived from the American Community Survey, conducted annually by the Census Bureau, and renter’s insurance information comes from area insurance companies, she said.

“We want to make sure [service] members are able to afford adequate and appropriate housing within a reasonable distance of their duty station,” Woehr said.

About one million service members receive BAH, she said, which is paid to service members in the U.S. who live off base or in privatized base housing. The allowance is designed to cover the total housing cost for the median rental housing type for the service member’s pay grade, Woehr said.

Service members who reside outside the U.S. receive an overseas
housing allowance, which is not affected by changes to BAH, she said.

BAH varies between pay grades because, by law, it is also determined in part by assessing the housing of civilians in similar pay brackets, Woehr said.

“We look at what civilians in a typical income range typically live in … and we price that type of housing for equivalently paid military personnel,” she said.

About 21 percent of BAH localities saw a net decrease, but service members already receiving a higher allowance at those locations will continue to receive it, Woehr said.

“We recognize that they’ve already made housing decisions based on that amount,” she said. “It’s only members newly reporting that will receive the new lower rates.”

Department of Defense officials also announced the new basic allowance for subsistence, or BAS, rates for military members. The new rates will take effect Jan. 1, 2013. Enlisted service members will receive $352.27 a month, up from $348.44 per month this year. Officers will receive $242.60 a month, up from $239.96 in 2012.

Annual adjustments to BAS — a monthly, nontaxable cash payment intended to be used to buy food — are linked to changes in food prices as measured by the U.S. Department of Agriculture. The index rose by 1.1 percent between the beginning of October 2011 and the end of September 2012, forming the basis for the increased BAS rates.